@nPhelendriqal: No autocorrect, I don't want to bang a bunch of hot chimps.
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@TheBeerGuy73: I'm skipping the gym today because I already have a six pack... waiting for me in the fridge at home.
@WGladstone: Should have guessed that Brad and Angelina weren't in it for the long haul when neither of them let themselves go.
@manwhohasitall: Wife online? Kids asleep? Time to relax & unwind with a damp cloth and a bottle of multi-surface cleaner. 'Me time'.
@Jayson_Two_time: Ummm yeah I want one of those phone case's where I can put my credit cards in with my phone so when I lose my phone I'm also broke. Genius!