@GuyConfused: No, I'm not damaging my liver. I'm about to sterilize it using alcohol.
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@SlabBaconBP: I hate when I accidentally say "I love you" instead of "I'm biologically driven to want to reproduce with you & I'm temporarily delusional"
@OuterJohn: 1) Throw a ball of yarn into a fencing battle 2) Wait until the fight is over 3) Retrieve your fully-knitted sweater
@senorwinces: If you watch Intervention backwards, it's about a person partying hard after an awful family reunion.