@LennoxTruman: No mom I won't go to "night school," I already get what night is, it's that bullshit thing where the sun turns into the moon for a few hours
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@amishschool: My son, 5, scared of the thunder. I told him that was silly considering the sun could explode any day, killing us all. Think that helped.
@Iwriteforcats: Cats make the best boyfriends because they're soft, loyal, and won't claim they're straight but then turn gay after one lousy date, BRENT!
@vanderwangwe: Her: I want to have your babies. Me: You'll have to wait until they get off from school.
@OVLH: I always keep a google search for "how to find anyone, anywhere, and kill them" open on my phone in case anyone steals it.