@MableGertrude: No one cared about leaving children in cars when I was young. I lived in the back of an old Buick with a pack of wild dogs until I was 9.
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@ElleOhHell: *discovering flying dinosaur* PALEONTOLOGIST: We'll call it pterodactyl, for "wing fingers" ME: *crumples up note that says skynosaur*
@batkaren: LITTLE MERMAID 2016: SEA WITCH URSULA: Your voice is mine mwaahahaha!!! ARIEL: *flicks eyes up; keeps texting*
@petemandik: I have just completed knitting a tiny sweater for my one true friend, who is a grape.
@Underchilde: Success is measured by how long it takes your boss to notice you’re not at your desk.