@CapoeiraPanda: No one girl should have all that power. 😂
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@BCMontgo: Me: I'll definitely do it tomorrow. Morgan Freeman: He wouldn't. Me: *chasing Morgan out of my house with broom* Why are you here again?
@JermHimselfish: *holding a rattlesnake in each hand* These are the angriest maracas I've ever played
@Mike_Bianchi: Not sure if this girl I'm talking to online is real, so on our first date I'm gonna bring an image captcha for her to solve.
@senorlumpy: You mean the world to me. Wife: You're talking to the tacos aren't you? This is correct.