@Parkerlawyer: No one has ever said, "You know what would make this even better? Turkey bacon."
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@ZombieProblms: You can't ban me from your neighborhood just because I "look scary" and "want to kill you." That's discrimination.
@Try2StopME: Guys, if you forget your girl's birthday, just look into her eyes and say, "I love you." Then run, because that is not going to help.
@ashmensch: This lady at the Edible Arrangement store acts like no one's ever asked for a corn dog bouquet before.