@highxpectation2: No one realizes when someone says, "The last thing I wanna do is hurt you," that basically implies: there is a list, hurting you is on it.
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@NikkiGlaser: Social experiments where skinny people wear fat suits teach us to be nicer to fat people because it might be a skinny person in a fat suit.
@RandomlyMJ: My exes new girlfriend has been calling me looking for him for days. It got old. I gave in and sent her the map and shovel.
@ManvAlcohol: What happens in Vegas stays on Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, Vine, and medical records.