@DothTheDoth: No one wants to talk about Dracula's defining quality, turning into thousands of bats to avoid human contact.
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@Anon_imosity: I bought my girlfriend a fridge for her birthday. Not a great gift I know, but you should've seen her face light up when she opened it
@capricecrane: Now's a good time to change your facebook name to "Nobody," so when you click like on ignorant statuses it says, "Nobody likes this."
@alexqarbuckle: Mike Pence getting booed at Hamilton is the worst thing to ever happen to a politician at a play