@bourgeoisalien: No, please continue to talk loudly on the phone, smoke & spit next to my table. No problem! I'm just going to follow you home and kill you.
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@jackmackenroth: I'm pretty sure all of the 7 dwarfs were named after a stage of Snow Whites' heroin addiction.
@yonewt: Sometimes I get flustered by waitresses and I say things like "Abso-fruit-ly!" and they laugh like I'm so clever but we both know
@FuckabillyRex: "Sorry, I have to take this call." "That's a banana. And it's half eaten." *covers banana with hand "I don't tell you how to do business."
@SamDeLanche: Good to know that if they ever release a lion in Walmart you only have to run faster than the fat lady with the zebra print pants on.