@squirrel74wkgn: No thank you, shower sex. I'll just step out of the shower and injure myself the old fashioned way.
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@Reverend_Scott: [bum holds his hand out] "can I have some change?" change comes from within "thank u. now I'm not poor anymore"
@trojansauce: [first day in the mafia] ME: *bursts in out of breath* STOP! BOSS: what ME: i just found out that this is *whispers* illegal
@WheelTod: [Interview] "Why'd you leave ur last job?" My boss felt threatened by me [Flashback to juggling lighters after dousing boss in gasoline]
@yungsweater: Can I get an amen? AMEN! Can I get a b-men? BMEN! Can I get a c-men? CME--*the whole church laughs*