@ericsshadow: No thanks Audi; I get all the uncompromised luxury I can handle by driving whatever car my wife thinks makes me look the most married.
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@HiddenPinky: The limerick writers on Twitter Can be justifiably bitter The limited length Is weakness, not strength And throws our last lines down the sh
@iamburtjarvis: [moving her panties to the side] HEY MAA, I'M MAKING ROOM FOR MY LEGOS IN YOUR UNDERWEAR DRAWER.
@omgthatspunny: It's not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn't have the balls to do it
@DrawingShadows: Answer: Marijuana Question: Why am I sitting here on the couch eating ice cream with a fork, watching Telemundo and wearing one sock?