@JaymayAllDay: "No thanks, I filled up on breadsticks." - Eve to the Serpent in the Olive Garden of Eden
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@WilliamRodgers: The baby spit up on my Xbox so I had to get rid of it... I'm gonna miss that baby...
@ThisOneSayz: Bring a toddler to your next robbery. Their smudgy fingerprints everywhere will make the forensics team cry.
@OtherDanOBrien: Mugger: Gimme yer wallet & don't do nuthin dumb Me: That's a double negative, my friend. Unlike Romance languages, English - hey, come back
@Landon8426: American Ninja Warrior is a bunch of people who took "the floor is lava" game way to seriously as kids.