@CulturedRuffian: "No way." -Jose
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@AmandasNotFunny: Sitting in my car eating McD's, and I hear a quiet voice behind me go: "Here, we have The Fat Woman in her natural habitat.."
@ericsshadow: FBI: If you testify you'll have to go into the Witness Protection Program ME: I'll do it FBI: Your wife and kids too ME: Oh ok never mind