@jctsmileyone: No YOU let your kid think he could turn the traffic lights green with his mind powers until he was 10 yrs old!
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@theshantilly: How long can one listen to a kid talk before it's officially considered a hostage situation?
@TweetingDadGuy: Please women who wear 1 inch heels. What's the point? You look ridiculous. What difference does 1 inch really make? Don't answer that.
@oxygenplug: *you see a bear approaching* "quick play dead!" *bear runs up to you* "OH GOD. WHO DID THIS TO YOU. ANSWER ME. WHO DID THIS TO YOUUUU"
@PopSlapFunk: 5: "Dad, to be the man of the house, you need to wear pants." Me: ... 5: ... Me: "It's a sacrifice I'm willing to make. Job's all yours."