@1Bad_Scientist: Nobody is happy. Be like Nobody.
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@ShittyComedian: So it turns out that fat bearded man whose lap I was sitting on at the mall wasn't Santa. LOL drugs.
@IamEnidColeslaw: it's fun to yell CHEESE! at a group of girls and watch them switch to their Facebook Poses
@TheAlexNevil: I've made friends on Twitter I never would've met in real life, and I wouldn't trade them for anything less than $200.
@amydillon: My favorite game with the kids is one where I play dead until they go around to their dad's side of the bed and wake him up.