@E_Ville13: Nobody suspects that you're digging a grave when you're always working on your landscape.
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@iamfase: The greatest trick Facebook ever pulled was to convince the world we actually want to keep in touch with people we went to school with.
@Holy_Mowgli: BOSS: you're fired ME: please give me another chance, I'm struggling to put food on the table BOSS: that's the problem…you're the worst waiter I've ever hired
@truegritrumble: GUY: Hey, hold the elevator! ME: *laughs to myself as I don’t hold the elevator* It’s the little things that make life worth living. *12 hours later* GUY: *who is apparently building maintenance* I was trying to warn you it was broken.