@rynbtmn: None of the scenarios in which I would require a watch that works 200m underwater are situations in which my watch would be my main concern.
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@ArfMeasures: ME *puts honey on toast* SON: Daddy, did you know bees make that? ME: Yeah of course [Later] ME [to date] Did you know bees make toast?
@SoulYodeler: Don't worry. Your secret is safe with me, I won't say a word about your "wenital werpes" *winks*
@michaelianblack: If countries don't want revolutions, they should stop putting large public squares in the middle of their cities. So stupid!
@Reverend_Scott: Wife: I don't think those fireworks look safe to use- Me: [lighting fireworks] who you think I'm gonna believe? You, or Six-Fingered Pete?