@trims_the_fat: None of this is appropriate for anybody. Take the 18+ out of your bio.
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@living_marble: Wild horses could easily drag me away from anything, even from my favorite activity. Wild horses are super crazy strong.
@teacup_giraffe: Walk up to the guy with a popped collar and spiked hair & say "What's up, Chad?" & he'll be all "Whoa... How'd you know my name, bro?"
@BradBroaddus: I just got booed off stage by a bunch of jerks that didn't appreciate my humor. That's the last time I'll do a eulogy.