@AsgardianRose: North Korea banned the use of sarcasm towards the government; I wouldn't last an hour before they executed me.
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@TheCiscoKidder: I ate a banana so big that my Facebook relationship status automatically changed from "Married" to "It's Complicated."
@juliussharpe: Before you get married ask yourself: is this the person you want to watch stare at their phone the rest of your life?
@vincevangone: I am "knows everything about Aardvarks because Mom bought an encyclopedia," years old.