@PortRooster: Not entirely sure what a "propriate" is, but apparently I'm in it...
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@iwearaonesie: wife: That guy is texting and driving! That is so dangerous! me [holding a donut in each hand and steering with my knee]: So dangerous
@UncleDuke1969: Lawrence starts cooking Lawrence checks Twitter Lawrence smells smoke Lawrence Fishburne
@UNTRESOR: Avoid unwanted pregnancies by using the "pull out" method where you pull out an acoustic guitar at a party & no one will have sex with you.