@JohnLyonTweets: Not only was my brother not mad when I backed into his Porsche, he even invited me camping and said to bring a shovel. Whew!
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@rickygervais: Suggested Thanksgiving Conversation starters: "Which God are we thanking again?" You're welcome :)
@llvvzz: Your psychiatrist's opinion about your social media habits don't count if he has less followers than you.
@TheTweetOfGod: Call Me crazy, but the ideal number of times a Pope should have once been a member of the Nazi Youth is zero.