@dumbbeezie: Not trying to brag but my son’s teacher wants his artwork to be looked at by a psychologist
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@urgeekisshowing: That awkward moment when someone asks if you've dyed your hair and you say no, its just clean.
@jakob_huber: "Get me another beer, boy" "Dad I'm an adult. My name's Bobby" "It's time you knew the truth boy. The 2nd & 3rd B's in your name are silent"
@novicefather: I like it soft and warm. Uh huh. Yea girl, go ahead and throw that figgy pudding in the microwave for a bit.