@goodtimenoel: Note to self: Before committing any murders, get head and shoulders. Can't be leaving DNA all over the place.
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@PeaceInTruth1: I've never watched CSI because I learned everything I need to know about solving crimes from watching Scooby Doo.
@rachelle_mandik: Whenever I hear a lady in the next stall trying to unwrap a tampon as quietly as possible I yell, "HEY, IS THAT CANDY? CAN I HAVE SOME?"
@Try2StopME: Avoid office small talk by maintaining that facial expression between first sneeze and second sneeze.
@CulturedRuffian: I ruined my diet to finish the last 5 donuts in the office because my coworkers are on a diet too so yeah, I sacrifice for the people I love