@marcia_bee: Note to self: "rubber" in the US does NOT mean "eraser". Bright side: my popularity in this office is at an all time high!
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@PorkUrPine: WIFE: look at that couple. He kisses his girl every time he sees her. Why can't you do that ME: I'd love to but I don't know her well enough
@noogscorner: Splinter: Leo. Mikey: I'm Michelangelo. That's Leo. Donny: I'm Donatello. That's Leo. Leo: I thought I was Raphael. - Why they wear masks
@johngcaldwell4: Me: *cleans kitchen and does laundry Wife: looks like someone is getting lucky Me: 1 hour of uninterrupted Call of Duty? W: Yes Me: WOOHOO!