@weinerdog4life: Note to self: Take Mila Kunis picture off of vacuum before taking it in for service next time.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@C00LpenNAME: "You miss 100% of the shots you don't take" Obituary: died of Malaria, Small Pox, Polio, & the flu
@neiltyson: I wonder what Cannibals & Aztecs would say, watching civilized people eat symbolic hearts of loved ones on Valentine’s Day.
@weinerdog4life: Serious Question: Can I get a moustache by kissing another guy with a moustache?
@doctorveritas: "I've got chills. They're multiplying." "Sir, you're going into shock. Please stop narrating--" "And I'm losing control." "Sir!"