@anotherbecky429: Nothing like the dreaded "Mom I missed the bus" text to get you up and moving.
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@Quartzjixler: Hey middle-aged people who suddenly change your first name--screw you. I'm calling you what I've been calling you for the last 10 years.
@lisaxy424: the mechanic said it would be $800 to fix my brakes and I actually thought "how badly do I need them"
@scott_towel: Convicted of murdering the English language, he was sentenced to death by elocution.
@DannyZuker: My kids are always accusing me of having a "favorite child" which is ridiculous because I don't really like any of them.