@zwina_summer: Nothing makes me scream louder during sex than when my husband calls to let me know he's on his way home from work.
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@Shock_Monster: Sure, Canada, feel safe now while US is just after oil. Wait 'til we run low on beer, ice, hockey players & f'd up ways to pronounce words.
@AmericanGent69: Online dating rule: If we meet up offline, and you look nothing like your pictures, then you're buying me drinks until you do.
@GypsyWingss: Mom: a little birdie told me you got drunk last night Me: you're the one friggen talking to birds