@Marlebean: Nothing makes me worry more than the kids saying "Don't worry, we cleaned it up"
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@aecide: Saw my neighbor in a peeing contest with his dog on his porch. My mum said there'd be days like this but she never said there'd be so many.
@BallsMcBallski: It's been five minutes since Adobe asked me to install an update. I hope they didn't go out of business or something.
@FattMernandez: I like that they put Bibles in hotel rooms. You never know when you're going to run into a vampire who's on a road trip.