@Horse_ebooks: Nothing says "I m not interested" quite as loudly as showing up for a date
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@Real_Dick_Head: *gets first nose bleed since childhood* Apparently our periods have synced, can I have some Midol and a tampon?
@SteveInevitable: When I'm looking for a parking spot I turn the radio down because clearly I can see better when it's quieter...
@captaincoximus: Remember before you give the finger from the safety of your car, not everyone has a schedule to keep
@Shut_up_Marissa: CW: How was your weekend? *finds nearest object* "Hello?" CW: Are you talking to a stapler? "I'm sorry, I have to take this."