@_eric_alexander: Nothing screams DUI like wearing a really nice suit on a city bus.
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@cepheusjackson: ME: The plane has wifi? Sweet, I'm going to Skype call that radio psychic. RADIO PSYCHIC: Go ahead caller, you're on the air ME: HOLY SHIT
@SatansTongue: (Selling my soul) Just sign here and here "I should have a lawyer read this" *a million lawyers crawl through hell* We have plenty of those
@senderblock23: If you love something, let it go. Unless that thing is a cat. Your cat will not come back.