@PJTLynch: Nothing's more infuriating than opening the in-flight magazine to see the Sudokus already half-done, in the colors of your rival Sudoku gang
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@Smethanie: I texted someone "hell yeah," but autocorrect changed it to "hell year" because even our phones know.
@fluffysuse: If it's your imperfections that make you beautiful, I'm pretty sure I should be a supermodel.
@krisv_723: Friend: What’s with all the extra guests? Me: You told me to bring the Cranberries. *Linger starts to play*