@rad_milk: [notices a girl is cold] here take my pants
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@Goofpoops: Walking dead spoiler alert. There are zombies and they like to try & eat people but the people are like "nuh uh zombie, we don't want that"
@DoogieHorner: Dogs are "practice babies" and cats are "practice ex-girlfriends you still have to share an apartment with."
@RatchetAfrican: Jack the Ripper and Winnie the Pooh have the same middle name. Coincidence? I think not...
@ShaneKnowsStuff: The girls I meet in bars have the worst pickup lines. They're like, "Hey, what's your friend's name?" Never works on me ladies.