@clarkekant: Obama says he’s pro-vaccine, GOP comes out against it. Now Obama needs to express his support for breathing.
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@jonnysun: i just foumd out that humpty dumpty is suposed to be an egg. nowhere in the humpty dumpty poem does it say that humpty dumpty is a egg
@LizHackett: I once saw a real bear in the wild and said "Aww, look at him!" What I'm saying is, don't turn to me for practical thinking in an emergency.
@kumailn: Life hack: Stare into your Uber driver's eyes through the rear view mirror the entire time.