@JermHimselfish: Of course this milk is fresh, I just saw it breakdancing in the back of the refrigerator.
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@briangaar: Son, let me tell you the story of the Three Bears. A girl broke into their house and they ate her. Stay out of my stuff, goodnight
@myonlymizztake: The answer to the question, "do these jeans still fit" depends on whether or not I actually have to sit down at any point.
@Donna_McCoy: My new table from Ikea is actually just the unopened box with a tablecloth thrown over it.