@mofrorock: "Of course you're the prettiest girl here, you just need to talk louder" - alcohol
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@NYC_Blonde: I wish I was a baby so I could pass out in public with a bottle and no one would look twice.
@Springaling85: Walking up to guys with girls with them and saying "you never called! Our son is 5 now" then walk away....always brightens my day
@lovemyboots111: "One day I caught myself smiling for no reason, then I realized I was thinking of you...." under a moving bus