@Moanhamed: OH AND JUST FYI.... THE BAGS UNDER MY EYES ARE LOUIS VUITTON
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@iwearaonesie: *pulls curtain back while wife is in the shower* me: Are we - stop screaming, it's just me- are we out of Cheetos?
@noog: Obama: Joe, look. Full moon Biden: What? TONIGHT? *starts shapeshifting* Obama: Joe? Biden: AARRGHHH *Gore kicks door down* Gore: MANBEARPIG
@DaddyJew: "Daddy, how are babies made?" "Well son, when a man and a woman have too much to drink.."
@SequelsWeWant: Freaky Friday 2: The mom and daughter switch bodies again The mom doesn't go back She keeps stealing children's bodies She lives forever