@djdarrellripley: Oh, calm down... One Cobra bite and you're falling to pieces!
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@AimeeHelene1: "And this is my creepy husband, John." (The way my friend should introduce her husband)
@weinerdog4life: Honey, I made the news! Apparently that old lady I fought at the library wasn't a ghost
@bobvulfov: COP: careful, this guy's insane DETECTIVE: ok [he walks into the interrogation room] ME: i dont like the creme part of oreos D: jesus christ
@jonnysun: DETROIT: im doing a secret show at 8pm tonigt at a small club dowmtown! mesage me for details!!! ME: omg a talkimg city