@PaulyPeligroso: "Oh, hey! I didn't even recognize you!" means "I saw you and tried to avoid you, but here you are."
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@Mr_Kapowski: Coworkers: Zack, you should come to a hookah bar with us! Me: Why? Who's celebrating their 12th birthday?
@david8hughes: [phone rings] "We've removed your son's missing picture from our milk cartons." "You found him?" "No, people stopped buying milk."