@joeldanger: Oh hey, sorry I accidentally rolled out of your bed, across your floor, down the stairs, out the door, into my car and back in my own bed.
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@paopao619: My relative's friend posted this. Wypipo so desperate to make the #LasVegasShooting about brown people #LasVegas
@Marlebean: "Make yourself at home." they say, then it's "Ma'am please put your bra back on." Make up your mind, library story time, make up your mind!
@patrickmarkryan: On a positive note, once Trump becomes president and burns the world to the ground, our student loan debt is essentially wiped clean
@Tommytoughstuff: That awkward moment when you run into your old pizza guy and you're with your new much younger pizza guy.