@boring_as_heck: Oh, I can't check my disobedient child with the rest of my luggage? You're saying I have to carry-on my wayward son?
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@yaboydil: Some say global warming is caused by an increase in greenhouse gases, but I know that's a cover up for the truth: too many hot local singles
@HaleyMDriscoll: My boyfriend said we could only get one cat. So I'm only getting one cat. One pregnant cat.
@Lisa_Laughs_: I'd like to thank my exs for encouraging me to learn about cars. Like how to cut the break lines, hoses, or discreetly slash a tire.