@yogaknifefight: Oh panic attacks,I thought you said pancake attacks because I have those all the time.
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@sarah1mc: I hate when I'm telling my best friend a story and she gets all judgmental and walks off to get a drink from her water bowl.
@mrsmith196645: I spent the day in nature and by nature I mean drinking beer on a golf course. I saw a butterfly.
@JennyJohnsonHi5: Be safe this weekend, otherwise your dumb friends will end up telling some local news reporter how you were always the "life of the party."
@5exyunchained: It’s a good thing not everyone has a smartphone. Someone has to honk when the light turns green.