@krisv_723: Oh, you asked if I had a perfect BEACH body. Now I see why you were confused when I said "Yes, I'm round, ripe & covered in fuzz."
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@JessObsess: It's so embarrassing when someone gets to second base with me and finds crumbs in my bra.
@NicestHippo: Facebook has a link to "Report a Problem" so I wrote "I'm not very close with my father." Now we wait I guess
@tat2skatermom: I have a doorbell chime for text messages. I just checked my door twice. I don’t have a doorbell. Line up boys. This kinda genius is rare.