@XplodingUnicorn: Oh, you have dignity? Well I have nachos. I win.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@im_not_smug: Coworker: That's a stupid song Me: Your face is stupid Coworker: Way to be mature Me: YOUR FACE IS MATURE!!
@SortaBad: You say tomato. I say tomato. Our eyes meet. We've decided on the perfect name for our baby
@briangaar: [checks facebook] I don't remember everyone I went to high school with loving the national anthem this much
@AimByWhiskey: My home security system is a nerf sword by the door. My liquor cabinet has a retina scanner, 3 pit bulls & my 7th grade lesbian gym teacher.