@Pro_Jones_: Oh you love your mom's cooking? Name 4 of her dishes.
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@Reverend_Scott: THIS IS THE POLICE. COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS UP. "Wrong house guys." ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THAT? "Yup, happens a lot." OKAY COOL, SORRY.
@thepunningman: Remember, you are statistically more likely to be killed by a donkey than a plane crash. [Donkey Pilot turns and does throat slit gesture]
@VodkaDietSoda: The second I sense someone about to ask for a bite of what I'm eating, I immediately shove the whole damn thing in my mouth & look baffled.
@markleggett: Congratulations on being the kind of person who corrects the grammar of others, unsolicited. You're the Microsoft Word Paperclip.