@GoogleChamiya: Oh, your account is protected? What do you tweet? Nuclear launch codes?
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@outsmartedmommy: The doctor told me I need to rest so I dropped the kids off at his office & now he won't stop calling me as if that's going to help me rest.
@Tmoney68: I've seen people tear a phone book in half with their bare hands & I just had to use scissors to open a bagged salad.
@UncleDuke1969: Laugh, and the world laughs with you... Keep saying "LOL" out loud, and you'll die alone. (For Judy in Accounting)