@GoogleChamiya: Oh, your account is protected? What do you tweet? Nuclear launch codes?
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@duplicitron: The best part of having a banana instead of a cell phone is no one on this plane can actually make me turn it off or stop talking into it.
@Brampersandon_: WAITER: Would you like the usual, Mr Smith? MR SMITH: *all smugly* Do birds fly? *Penguin at the next table slams down his menu*
@Contwixt: Pluto should totally move on and find a solar system that's going to treat it with the respect it deserves.