@murrman5: ok, now say it again so my wife hears
"you're too big for this ride, sir"
@aLunchBox: I hate when fire trucks drive real slow with the siren on. There's one behind me right now. So annoying.
@behindyourback: This Slow Jaywalker Thinks The Driver Of The Oncoming Car Values Human Life More Than Proving A Point, What Happens Next Will Surprise Him!
@Sassafrantz: [public restroom]
Me: We'll have to go some place else, it says "unavailable"
Mom: Even the toilet found someone before you
@theydidthemath: Get shit on Ava