@hilaryfairie: Omg, autocorrect! For the millionth time, I don't hate all those birches...
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@TheToddWilliams: Wife: I'm glad you're watching TLC and looking to improve yourself. So who are your new friends? Husband: These would be your Sister Wives
@neiltyson: Mysteries of #Gravity: Why Bullock's hair, in otherwise convincing zero-G scenes, did not float freely on her head.
@samalmightysam: -Knock Knock! -Who is it? -The love of your life. - :) Really? -Hahahaha no, it's the pizza you ordered.