@2tickytacky: OMG. My wife's boyfriend made such a fuss when I told his parents at dinner about how noisy those two are in bed.
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@brennadine: [High Stakes Poker] Dealer: Are you in or are you out? Schrödinger's Cat: [For the 20th time] BOTH [Player flips table]
@SergioValenCo: I hope I die doing something extreme like climbing Mt. Everest or telling a woman I don't like her new haircut.
@JustUnstableMe: Boss: Where's the progress report I asked u for Me: I haven't made any progress that's my report What I imagine it'd be like if I had a job
@Just_Lee_: It took 11 years but hubby can finally read me like a book. A Greek book. Read upside down wearing a blindfold. It's a vast improvement.