@jakob_huber: On a bad dinner date? Bump the table with your knee to make the water in your glass ripple. Claim a T-Rex is coming. Sprint out the door.
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@therepoguy: My dog really needs to learn how to drive a stick because what good is fetching one bottle of vodka.
@bobvulfov: [hunting] DAD: dont scare him ME: did u know we dump 16 tons of sewage into our waters every minute DEER: holy shit DAD: what did i just say
@buhsbaby_baby: Can I get pregnant from looking at a man in another car, at a red light but then quickly looking away when he looks over?