@Bandersnaaatch: On autopsy, instead of pumping my stomach to determine what I've eaten in the past 24 hours, a coroner need only look down my cleavage.
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@ericsshadow: My wife ordered a pizza from Papa John's but I saved a step by throwing up before it got here.
@ClearlyUnwell: I've just realised that I've got one of those cool body types that can eat whatever I want and get fat.
@Gre_Gone: Praying Mantis: *attends church, devours husband* Agnostic Mantis: *stares suspiciously up at the sky, devours husband*